“And you shall go out and grow fat like stall-fed calves.” Malachi 4:2 (NKJV).

This verse was of great comfort to me during the pandemic, as I slowly accumulated the quarantine fifteen! I mean what else were we supposed to do all day at home? Isn’t this verse clear permission from the Bible itself? Of course not, but how do we know that? How can you tell what a verse was intended to communicate?

If you’ve been around Bible study or church long enough, you’ve probably heard a pastor or teacher remind you that “context is king” when it comes to understanding the Bible. When we just pluck verses out of their historical, cultural, and Biblical setting, we can fail to see the true meaning or intent behind them. This becomes problematic when people “proof text”-- shorthand for using a Biblical passage or verse to prove or justify a theological position without taking into account the context of the passage you’re referencing. (Don’t quit reading after that sentence, it gets better…)

This can be dangerous and misleading, true, but let’s face it, sometimes it can be downright funny. I, of course, take the Bible very seriously, and am not intending to be irreverent, but here’s where plucking verses out of their context might not just give you bad theology but a case of the giggles to boot.

We could misuse all manner of verses from the Bible to tell us a variety of things. 

Let’s start with our bodies:

“All the fat is the Lord’s.” Leviticus 3:16 (NIV).

Thank goodness for this verse. It helps me to excuse those extra pounds that I can pack on in the winter…spring, summer and fall. I’m thinking of cross stitching this one for my kitchen! Choosing the hamburger over the salad can now feel like a spiritual act.

Or while we are talking about bodies, there’s this one:

“Lord, by this time he stinketh” John 11:39 (KJV).

Or as some old timers like to say, “The body stinketh.” For all you mothers of adolescent boys, you need only trot this verse out to prove the merits of daily deodorant application. In fact, this would be a good verse to hang prominently in the bathroom for all manner of odors. 

Speaking of teenage boys…

This next one was the original version of “Home Alone” except it was actually not home and not alone:

41 Every year Jesus’ parents went to Jerusalem for the Festival of the Passover. 42 

When he was twelve years old, they went up to the festival, according to the custom. 43 After the festival was over, while his parents were returning home, 

the boy Jesus stayed behind in Jerusalem, but they were unaware of it. 

44 Thinking he was in their company, they traveled on for a day. 

Then they began looking for him among their relatives and friends. 

45 When they did not find him, they went back to Jerusalem to look for him. 46 After three days they found him in the temple courts, sitting among the teachers, listening to them and asking them questions. Luke 2:41-46 (NIV).

Instead of the 1990 Christmas comedy, we have the one whom Christmas celebrates being left in the temple by his parents. I can imagine Mary and Joseph did not find this a laughing matter any more than Kevin McCallister’s parents did on their return trip to find their son. But instead of frantically flying home in a snowstorm, Mary and Joseph were trudging back in the desert. 

Jesus obviously enjoyed being in the temple more than Eutychus. From him, we can learn about the perils of letting your mind wander off during a Sunday morning sermon:

Seated in a window was a young man named Eutychus,

who was sinking into a deep sleep as Paul talked on and on.

When he was sound asleep, he fell to the ground from the third story and

was picked up dead. Acts 20:9 (NIV).

If we had to consider becoming a fatality for dozing off on Sunday morning, we might focus and maybe even take notes on the sermon! I can’t help but also see it from a speaker’s perspective: when your talk is so boring that someone precariously perched on a third-floor window sill is less concerned with plummeting to his death than staying awake–you might need to reassess how compelling your content is. (Don’t worry, the man was revived.) 

We can even use verses to give us relationship advice, like this first one that shows us how not to explain our bad choices…. 

So I told them, ‘Whoever has any gold jewelry, take it off.’ 

Then they gave me the gold, and I threw it into the fire, 

and out came this calf!” Exodus 32:24 (NIV).

If our Biblical heroes have such lame excuses, why can’t we? It reminds me of when my son  insisted he didn’t know how my glass vase broke but stood holding the evidence of a pillow fight in his arms. 

There’s more relational wisdom to gain. If you’re dating or just looking to edify your spouse, you should definitely use one of the great compliments at your disposal in the Old Testament. You might try this one:

Your teeth are like a flock of sheep just shorn, 

coming up from the washing. Each has its twin;

not one of them is alone.  Song of Solomon 4:2 (NIV).

Be warned: this flattery only works if the object of your affection has more than one tooth. But do try to avoid other parts of the Old Testament, as they will definitely not have the

complimenting effect you’re after, for example:  

“You are old and advanced in years…” Joshua 13:1 (ESV)

OR

“Get out of here, baldy!” 2  Kings 2:23-24 (NIV)

Navigate this bumpy terrain of Biblical comments successfully and you may actually find yourself in need of relief, like the Psalmist: 

“Be merciful to me, O God, for men hotly pursue me.” Psalm 56:1 (NIV) 

Of course, many of our single friends might wish this verse said, “Hot men pursue me!”

Then for the married folk, there’s this little proverb on wedded bliss:

Better to live on the roof than share the house with a nagging wife. 

Proverbs 21:19 (Good News Translation)

This should at least give you pause before you ask your husband to pick up his socks for the eigth time in a row. (Though evidently he can leave his socks anywhere he wants on the roof). 

Lastly, consider this: 

“God has brought me laughter. All who hear about this will laugh with me.’” 

Genesis 21:6 (NIV)

See, theology can be fun! Hopefully it’s clear that I was not, in fact, handling these Biblical passages with the care and analysis that they deserve. I think the God who created humor likely doesn’t mind that we employ it to teach us a bigger lesson. Isolating verses to support our own opinions is no laughing matter. We must read more of scripture and seek the full context of a passage and allow the Holy Spirit to show us the real meaning.  And if I didn’t get my point across effectively, I can only hope you weren’t reading this from an open attic window…. 

ABOUT OUR BLOGGER 

Bonnie Kotler and her husband Mitch have two daughters, three sons, seven grandchildren and three grand-puppies. She was a stay-at-home mom for many years before re-entering the workforce after receiving her M.S. in Counseling and Human Relations from Villanova University. She is a licensed professional counselor at The Peacemaker Center and her own private practice, True North Counseling. Bonnie has been on the Willowdale women’s ministry teaching team since 2012. Bible studies have played a key role in her walk as a believer, and in turn, she loves to help other women find their peace with God and grow in their faith. She enjoys writing Bible study materials, reading fiction, spending time with family and doing anything in the sunshine. Bonnie loves to laugh and considers laughter as the best medicine.  Psalm 126:2

Disciples making disciples. That's our commission from Jesus himself. It's one thing to learn about discipleship but another to put it into practice in community with other women. Please join us for one of our Fall women's groups, as we learn to be with Jesus and to be like Jesus.

CLICK HERE to get a taste of all Women's ministry is offering, and PLEASE register by September 7 to ensure we have plenty of books and materials for our first week. New this year is an upgraded children's program during our morning groups, including music to enhance our children's experience.

You might also consider joining one of our new Discovery Bible Groups on Wednesday nights at both campuses. We invite anyone new to Willowdale, new to the faith, disconnected from church community, or if you are in a group but need a reboot, to join us. All our welcome! Groups are available for women, men and couples. Register for a Discovery Bible Group here.

Please don't hesitate to contact Carole Hoy, Women's and Groups' Pastor at Willowdale Chapel, if you have any questions. choy@willowdalechapel.org