When my oldest child was one year old, he was playing with a toy phone and I realized that he will not have the character-building experience that I did as a child of learning how to answer a shared family landline phone, take a message, and practice his manners with whoever calls. But neither will he endure days of itching and oatmeal baths due to chicken pox since he’s gotten the vaccine. In sum, he is growing up in a different generation from his parents. Obvious, I know, but I often think about what other changes his generation faces.
If the recent division over issues such as women and life, race, gender, mental health and violence are any indication, he will know much more about much more at a younger age than I did.
It’s one of the many reasons my husband and I want to be connected with Christian community. We know that serving and walking through life with other followers of Jesus is the best for us, our family, and our community because it’s how God designed it to work best for everyone; it also brings Him glory.
When I was a child, my family’s lifestyle was one of active participation in the life of our local church and the global Church. My parents modeled sacrificial giving to missionaries for whom we prayed each weekday morning at breakfast.
When I was in middle school, my second homes were those of families in my church whom I knew I could trust and who would talk to me and my friends about what was right and wrong, and what God had to say about it.
When I was a teenager and didn’t want to talk to my parents about everything happening in my life, it was my youth group leaders who were there, week after week, listening, teaching and living by example.
When I looked at how to spend my summers, it often included some type of service project or mission trip with my church, the expectation being set that I should love not just myself, but those in my community and around the world.
When I was trying to determine how to articulate my faith before graduating high school, it was my friends who had been in church and Bible studies with me since 4th grade that provided a safe place to process and challenge my beliefs, solidifying the truth God had been weaving into our hearts and minds over the years.
When I was in college, God provided incredible depth of relationship through my campus ministry, RUF, where authentic relationships included confessing our sins and struggles, praying for each other, and walking through all the transitions of college life into adulthood together while under the preaching and fellowship of our local church.
So yes, I want all of these types of things in place for my sons, too. I want them to have safe places to fall and strong mentors to disciple them. But now, facing my forties next year, was all of that benefit and teaching in my younger years merely the laying of a foundation that was good for me, but now is unneeded in my daily life? Shouldn’t I have a pretty good grasp of what this life with Christ looks like by now? Church is great for children, but for adults, it’s not as much of a necessity; we have it figured out, right?
Well, I don’t. Each new season of my life certainly benefits from the foundation God has built in me over the years through the church and its people, (and in the lonely seasons it has proven a firm foundation) but it also shows me how much I need that continued community.
In a culture and time that pushes us to be autonomous and strong on our own, the Bible tells us the benefits of working on friendships and community:
Proverbs 12:24-28
Diligent hands will rule,
but laziness ends in forced labor.
Anxiety weighs down the heart,
but a kind word cheers it up.
The righteous choose their friends carefully,
but the way of the wicked leads them astray.
The lazy do not roast any game,
but the diligent feed on the riches of the hunt.
In the way of righteousness there is life;
along that path is immortality.
This sounds like work, though, you might be thinking. Well, yes, it is. And work is good for us! God’s first plan for Adam was to work the land and prosper. But the fruit from that work was the flourishing of the world and the formation of the first human community.
As Paul wrote to the church in Thessalonica,
1 Thessalonians 5: 12-24
Now we ask you, brothers and sisters, to acknowledge those who work hard among you, who care for you in the Lord and who admonish you.
Hold them in the highest regard in love because of their work. Live in peace with each other.
And we urge you, brothers and sisters, warn those who are idle and disruptive, encourage the disheartened, help the weak, be patient with everyone.
Make sure that nobody pays back wrong for wrong, but always strive to do what is good for each other and for everyone else.
Rejoice always,
pray continually,
give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.
Do not quench the Spirit.
Do not treat prophecies with contempt
but test them all; hold on to what is good,
reject every kind of evil.
May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.
The one who calls you is faithful, and he will do it.
Not only does community require effort and work and yield benefits for the world around us, but it is also an ongoing call on our hearts and lives. It is not a one and done – and neither are the benefits.
This is the part where some might expect me to say that once you devote yourselves to your church community, you receive blessing upon blessing and all works for the good. But let’s not cheapen the Gospel.
Instead of promising me an easy life, I see how Scripture promises a secure and joyful life no matter what I face. And in addition to my personal communion with God and the indwelling Holy Spirit, how is that largely done? Through other followers of Jesus being in my life and me in theirs.
In Romans 12 Paul exhorts the church to use their various gifts to serve. And how does he conclude that good word? Not by saying “and in doing so, your life will be easier and all will go well for you.” No, instead he says in verses 12 and 13, “Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.”
Did you catch that? Hope and affliction and prayer all go together. We’ll all face troubles and we all need help. Graciously, God has given us the Holy Spirit and other believers to help us.
Let’s think about how we may walk more deeply in the way of Jesus by seeking fellowship and community in our local church that allows us to fulfill our created purpose of work and service, not to make life easier, but to lay hold of the richness of knowing Him and glorifying Him as he intended.
ABOUT OUR BLOGGER
Originally from Georgia, Mary Beth Gombita is a lover of sweet tea, a proud Georgia Bulldog and an avid music fan. She works in public relations, running her own communications consulting business from home. Mary Beth and her husband, Stephen, have two young sons. She is currently the editor of our Willowdale Women blog.
Disciples making disciples. That's our commission from Jesus himself. It's one thing to learn about discipleship but another to put it into practice in community with other women. Please join us for one of our Fall women's groups, as we learn to be with Jesus and to be like Jesus.
CLICK HERE to get a taste of all Women's ministry is offering, and PLEASE register today to ensure we have plenty of books and materials for our first week. New this year is an upgraded children's program during our morning groups, including music to enhance our children's experience.
You might also consider joining one of our new Discovery Bible Groups on Wednesday nights at both campuses. We invite anyone new to Willowdale, new to the faith, disconnected from church community, or if you are in a group but need a reboot, to join us. All our welcome! Groups are available for women, men and couples. Register for a Discovery Bible Group here.
Please don't hesitate to contact Carole Hoy, Women's and Groups' Pastor at Willowdale Chapel, if you have any questions. choy@willowdalechapel.org